The Nikkigeist: first edition
Only girl in the world sydrome, bras are out, gum is in and other things
Welcome to the Nikkigeist
Only Girl In The World Syndrome
I used to frequent a certain now-popular bar regularly. The bartender always paid me special attention 🏆 He was practically begging me to go out with him. He’d attempted to enchant me with an elaborate hypothetical date and an assurance that I’d fall for him. It was a point of entertainment between my friends and me— his persistence was getting to me lol. I was close to cracking and penulitmately agreeing to go.
One day, my friends and I are at said bar. He says hi to me as usual and we start talking about him at our table. My friend asks: How many girls do you think he’s doing that to?
I am stopped dead in my tracks.
Other girls?
I’m gagged. I had l-i-t-e-r-a-l-l-y not even thought about that.
I tell her, “That thought has literally never crossed my mind. I thought I was the only one...” as the realization of how stupid that was settled in. I’m kinda speechless tbh. I’m laughing at the hilarity of it all because what kind of deluded freak would not have realized that he was hitting on other chicks too?
The kind of deluded freak that thinks she’s the only girl in the world. That’s who.
And that who, is me.
My friend burst out laughing: “Nicole, he probably does it to every girl who walks into the bar. You really thought you were the apple of his eye!!! LMfao.”
I really did lol.
I live in a deluded reality where I am the only girl that exists. If a guy is talking to me, I immediately assume I am his #1.
On the one hand, this works to my advantage. If I’m not thinking about the fact that someone is entertaining other prospects, then I probably appear confident, poised, and unfazed.
On the other hand, I’m perfectly primed to fall for their tricks. When they shower me with compliments, I naturally assume they’re tailored and sincere, not feigned and regurgitated to every girl they talk to.
Knowing this reality has no bearing on my behaviour. For some reason, understanding that guys are entertaining multiple options at once simply does not compute in my brain. It’s difficult to fathom how a man would not immediately perceive me as his dream girl. I, actually, often think I am everybody’s perfect gf. Maybe this is the most conceited thing I could say. I’m certainly not beating the narcissism allegations. But, truly, I think I am the type of person who appeals to all creeds.
Anyway, I don’t plan on changing my POV on this subject because I think my blind confidence is an instinct worth leaning into. I do think, though, that it’s a hilarious concept. More women should adopt this attitude.
Either way, I have officially decided that I’m giving up on trying to date. At least in Montreal. I keep saying that actually and then, I don’t. That’s because I’m a Scorpio and therefore a true romantic.
Bras are out
I was never really a free-the-nip girl. I’ve always considered myself a modest dresser. Lately though, and as many of you may have noticed, I have actually delivered on my endless promises to dress sexier. By that, I suppose I mean in more fitted clothes. I think it mostly comes from a boredom with the oversized. And perhaps this newfound acceptance of my figure, paired with the unbearable heat of the summer, is what has led me to declare: bras are out.
I am extremely particular about bras. It’s shocking that I’ve never mentioned them on PN, actually. I only wear lace or mesh bras. Almost exclusively Agent Provocateur. I have one Yasmine Eslami, that I love but desperately needs replacing. Agent Provocateur is not as expensive as people think. They have crazy sales where you can get them for 60-80 dollars. But even at full price, I swear they are the best investment. They last forever and no other bra fits like them. If you’re not working with a lot, then I guess it wouldn’t really matter to you. I occasionally get ads for bras designed for small-busted ladies and that really grinds my gears for some reason. It feels like junior high where every girl desperately wants a bra to participate in the transition to womanhood. But if you don’t need to wear one you should consider yourself blessed. I wouldn’t if I didn’t have to. Wearing a bra does not make or break a woman. It’s silly.
But that ~got me thinking~ about the concept of ‘having to wear a bra’ in general. Like, what does that even mean? It’s really stupid when you think about it. The idea that the natural shape is sloppy and unattractive. Like, why? That’s nature. And nature is beautiful!
Bras can be fun and they can completely transform an outfit. Sometimes it’s the part of dressing that is the hardest because different bras give different shapes. There is a delicate selection process in picking the right one to suit each top. But sometimes, no matter how ‘natural’ of a lift you get, it just doesn’t go with the vibe.
So I’m embracing going braless where appropriate. Because there is nothing wrong with letting the girls hang, no matter what size.
Gum is in
I feel like I may have already mentioned this. Two summers ago an ex-friend of mine and I had a whole conversation about this when she started chewing healthy gum and I just started chewing Excel and then we went to this party and this girl was ALSO chewing gum and we were like wait? Is gum back?
And gum is back.
You used to be out with friends and offer someone a piece of gum and everyone would refuse!! and make you feel like a leper!! I stopped doing it because it was starting to make me feel weird.
Now you open a pack of gum and everyone has their hands out, begging!!! Get your own!!! Is what I want to say but don’t. Because I love that gum is back.
Maybe there was something about gum that felt like it was outing yourself for being self-conscious about your breath. We can attribute to all those awful gum ads.
Or maybe it was the fear of being a smacker, which some people seem like they really can’t control?
Or maybe it’s just a return to the tacky, gaudy, skanky, classless recession era we are living in. Because tan lines are also in and that goes with the same vibe.
The 80s
The 80s are back. I’m such an 80s girl so I love this. Nylons are 80s, polka dots are 80s, capris are 80s, belts are 80s, bangles are 80s, pastels are 80s, pearls are 80s, bistro dining is 80s.
Right now I’m obsessed with Irving Penn at Clinique. I think Clinique is due for a comeback and they should really lean on referencing those images for their rebrand, instead of their hideous new Simihaze-type packaging that truly looks like garbage. No offense Clinique. I love you. Please call me 📞
Not replying to messages that don’t need to be replied to
When Instagram launched the emoji-react messenger feature it seemed like we had a collective obsession with heart-ing every message. I guess heart-ing the last message was a way of acknowledging without being called out for leaving someone on the dreaded seen. Embarrassing. I think part of this has also been influenced by Slack culture, where your manager wants you to emoji updates as a form of acknowledgement or receipt of information. Fine.
But there is this pride dance we do around messaging that is just so odd. We have lost the plot on communication today. Overthinking everything out of fear we’ll be embarrassed when someone doesn’t reply. Everyone is so insecure. We need to get over this.
This habit progressed into what seemed to be a societal tick where people were heart-ing EVERY SINGLE MESSAGE. Like calm down everybody.
So I am obsessed with NOT hearting messages as a form of acknowledgement. I only heart the messages I like. I vary the reactions if the messages are funny or sad or good or bad etc. There is nothing wrong with an old thumbs up or down.
But my favourite thing of all, is simply not replying when there is nothing left to say.
You should try it.
Lifechanging.
And it will help you stop overthinking when other people don’t reply to you.
Missoni, Pucci, and the colour Purple
This is probably the Summer of Gimaguas influence, but I am warm to the integration of Missoni, Pucci, and generally speaking: the colour purple. I don’t know if it’s just me, but looking through the whole Gimaguas offering, I see a lot of Missoni vibes…
I have been harping on purple for a while I think. I bought a purple hoodie in December that I need to start wearing so it develops that washed colour. There actually is a new sweatfleece colour at Aritzia called Nightshade Blue that I am loving and is exactly the vibe. I won’t buy because it’s overpriced and I don’t like the fit or the zip but, it’s the perfect shade. I wish Brandy Melville would design a hoodie in an in between the oversized size and the small size, in that colour.
A lot of the Missoni colour combos are kind of atrosh, but there is something fun about making Missoni cool and, this ALSO harkens back to an old picky nikki (that I can’t find now of course) where I was trying to explain that Italian colour-combining vibe; I think it was Cavalli vibes.
Oh also I feel like it’s time for a DKNY comeback too. But more on that another time.
